Advice for the Mother of the Bride

by | Aug 23, 2021 | Bridal

Nervous mothers are often worried about what to say or do during their daughter’s wedding gown dress shopping appointment. So many thoughts and concerns run through the mind of a mom! The bride can also be fearful of what her mother may say. So we’re here to help!  

What is the appropriate amount of guidance and feedback that a mom should give? Should she tell her daughter which gown is her favorite? Does a daughter really want an opinion from her mom about fashion? Can mothers truly be an active participant in the final decision?

The search for a wedding dress is often stressful and emotional! But, it really can be a wonderful time for mother/daughter bonding.  Based on our experience, we’d like to offer some words of wisdom to ease a mother’s mind while accompanying her daughter:

Relax and allow yourself to enjoy the purpose of the appointment. Your daughter invited you to be present at this moment because your presence matters. Deep down inside, every daughter wants her mother’s approval. Your love and support mean the world to her. Simply being there for her with an open, loving heart is most important. 

Continue to tell your daughter she is beautiful. She wants to hear those words come out of your mouth. She dreams of making you proud. The only thing you must remember to do during the appointment is smile and nod to express your pride. 

If she happens to ask you which dress you like best, just smile. Resist any temptation to admit you actually have a favorite. Even if you do not like her top pick, refrain from expressing your opinion. She’s really hoping you will love her favored dress as much as she does. Therefore, do not disappoint her by expressing hesitation. She will be crushed if your opinion differs from hers. Deep down inside, she only wants to please you. She needs to hear her mother again repeat the words: “You look so beautiful.”  

Your daughter is capable of making her own decisions because you taught her well. She wants to know that you respect her choices too. Remind her that she is smart and you completely trust her to pick a dress she looks and feels amazing in. She is the one wearing the dress, so she must make the decision.  Your daughter is now a grown woman, so please allow her to select the dress she wants to wear. Do not attempt to talk her into wearing something you want. Let her lead the way. Show your daughter the respect she deserves by supporting her choice. Be a supportive mother!

When she does say YES to her dress, do not deflate her moment by suggesting she “sleep on it.”  The excitement is in the moment she knows this is her dress. She wants to jump for joy and celebrate! Suggesting she spend the evening thinking about it will only destroy her self-esteem. In our experience, no bride ever appreciated this suggestion from her mother. The thrill of finding your perfect dress is gone after sleeping. 

In summary, take pride in watching your “little girl” become a woman.  Give your daughter many reasons to be happy she invited you shopping. Genuinely share in her joy and excitement!

Wishing all our brides and mothers the most joyful and successful shopping experience ever!

love mom

Kathryn’s Bridal

3807 West Elm Street (Rt. 120), McHenry, Illinois 60050

By appointment only: 815.385.7330


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